5 Habits That Affects Your Self-Esteem (And How to Correct It)

Self-esteem is not a new word to you. It is commonly used amongst social gatherings like schools, workplaces, and even at home. And when it is being spoken of, we are usually advised to have a high level of self-esteem. 

Self-esteem is confidence in one’s own worth. It is the overall respect one has for himself and his abilities. It is a subjective evaluation of one’s self.

Self-esteem affects our decisions, thoughts, relationships, and ultimately our wellbeing. It can motivate or hinder us from performing tasks, even though we want to. Little wonder we are always advised to develop high self-esteem.

As much as we are expected to have high self-esteem, developing it takes time and requires intentional efforts, and most times, our habits have a way of decreasing our level of self-esteem. Some of these habits are:

1. Self-critical Thought Patterns.

This type of thought pattern usually looks like this:

I’m a failure.

What if I mess up?

I don’t think I can do it.

I shouldn’t have done this.

Accepting your mistake is one thing, criticizing yourself is worse. Most times, we don’t even realize when we are being self-critical because we have been so used to it. Instead, we should approach our mistakes with compassion and love as we would to a friend. Say this instead:

I am not a failure.

I know I won’t mess this up.

I can do it.

I would be better next time.

2. Comparing Yourself to Others.

Everyone is guilty of this, one time or the another but it doesn’t mean it cannot be stopped. Comparing yourself with others does nothing good to you, it only reduces your self-worth. Instead, practice self-love and acceptance to replace this destructive habit.

3. Wrong Use of Social Media.

As someone who is actively involved on social media, I have had my share of this. We are vulnerable to every information we see and most times naïve. It’s easy to find yourself feeling inferior and without importance, and often, we just want to be like them.

Social media is full of lifestyles that have been edited to show only the perfect things. You don’t always get to see behind the scenes.

Unfollow accounts that are not helpful and unfriend people that make you feel inferior. Refuse to believe everything you see on social media; they have been carefully edited. Social media was made to improve human interaction not decrease self-esteem.

4. Keeping the Wrong People Around You.

We often associate with people better than us because we believe they help us become better. What happens when it doesn’t work out that way? Just like social media, being around people who make us doubt ourselves does much harm to our self-esteem. 

Normalize cutting off relationships that are not helpful to your wellbeing. 

5. Allowing Your Mistakes Define You.

Mistakes are inevitable, some circumstances are too; you should not allow them to define who you are. Failure is a growth process, not a personality trait. 

When you allow your circumstances to define you, you find yourself with fluctuating self-esteem; having high self-esteem when you gain achievement, and a low one when you experience failure.

Self-esteem is an opinion, which means it can be changed. If your low self-esteem is a result of any habit, habits can be replaced too. Examine yourself and find out why you have low self-esteem and replace it with a better one. Improving your self-esteem takes time and requires intentional efforts, don’t try to rush it.